Smoking Cure

I have been running studies on the ongoing abuse of tobacco and have found, through extensive research and double blind tests, that cancer is directly linked to smoking.

It is an established fact that government efforts to eliminate smoking have been far from successful. Based on this direct link that I have documented between the occurance of cancer and act of smoking I propose that the United States Congress institute the necessary laws to ban cancer. That is the single most effective method to eliminate smoking.

There may be ways to bring carbon credits into the equation but I will need additional funds for that research.

Please forward all grant funds in unmarked 100 dollar bills.

Thank you.